We have all been in a conversation with the person who doesn’t even try to mask that they are smarter than everyone else. How does this person make everyone feel?
Now think about the conversation where you are speaking with a person who you get the hint that they must be really smart but they are humble about it. Later you find out just how smart they really are. How do you feel after that conversation?
In his book, The 48 Laws of Power, Robert Greene says the following:
“In general…always make people believe they are smarter and more sophisticated than you are. They will keep you around because you make them feel better about themselves…”
Think about it? No one likes to feel like they are dumber than the person they are speaking with. We all want to be the “hero” in our own stories not the idiot. What happens when we are made to feel like the idiot? We shutdown and get defensive.
Parents, think about this with your kids? When you stand tall and talk down to them, how has that gone?
Spouses, how do you feel when you partner talks down to you?
Now think about when you downplay your intelligence and allow the other person to discover the truth on their own, how do those conversations go?
Yes, you may be the smartest person in the room but if you keep telling everyone just how smart you are then you might be the only person in the room eventually.