“If you ain’t first, you last.” -Ricky Bobby
As the baby of the family I wanted to be like my older brother but I also wanted to be better than him. Nothing could compare with the feeling of beating my older brother.
My brother and I were so competitive not just for the sake of being the best but because we were also trying to impress our dad so that maybe we could earn his approval.
Surprise, surprise we were never good enough.
Recently I was talking to my oldest daughter during a car ride. We were discussing the results of her softball tryouts. She had made the C team.
Given that I am still recovering from an “if you ain’t first” issue, I was a little sad and embarrassed for her. The previous season she was on the A team.
When I asked her about it, her response shocked me. She was totally fine with it. She just wanted to play softball with her friends.
“Wait. Your identity isn’t crushed by not being first?” Umm…I don’t know how to respond.
Then it hit me.
She isn’t me. She wants to play the game for the joy of playing with her friends. Even better is that she doesn’t feel like she needs to earn my approval by impressing me with her skills even though I am highly impressed by her.
Does she give her best? Absolutely. But at the end of the day, she knows dad will be proud of her regardless of the results on the softball field.
Way to go kiddo!